resume softskills hardskills list strengths weaknesses how to identify them mindmapping
- Asking for feedback?
- intelligences
- multiple intelligences
- promoting empathy, respect and cooperation
- https://www.idrlabs.com/multiple-intelligences/test.php
- first idea
- IQ
- measurable
- multiple intelligences
- lateral thinking…
- learning to deal with people in software developpement
- everyone wants to feel important → need for recognition, connexion, understanding
- Avoid dismissing other’s ideas to emphasise your own
- Listen to people, like really and not talking
- Never criticise → need for recognition, empathy, understanding, peace, connexion
- Prefer praise and encouragement to criticism
- think about what the other person wants → empathy, understanding, peace, connexion
- Listen to the other person and try to understand their context and needs
- Avoiding arguements → peace, calm
- Before starting an argument try to figure out if you are in the right mind for it, and if it is really worth it
- Try to understand what is your need behind wanting to argue with about a certain topic
- Before starting an argument try to figure out if you are in the right mind for it, and if it is really worth it
- Taking action → improvement, connexion, safety/comfort, meaning/belonging
- Improving people skill is therefore very important, whatever the area of life
- everyone wants to feel important → need for recognition, connexion, understanding
- communication and misunderstanding
- Emotions, culture, experience and education are all part of communication
- Body language and vocals also influence the perception of your messages
- For instance you can get really far in empathy simply by satying silence but showing you listen by your body language
- It’s not always useful to speak
- Body language and vocals also influence the perception of your messages
- Emotions, culture, experience and education are all part of communication
- Assertiveness and benevolent communication (communication bienveillante)
- Types of reactions
- Passive → forgetting their own needs and wants, hard time saying no, hard time making decisions, avoiding confrontation
- Aggressive → only concerned by their needs, lose temper, using confrontation, criticizing, angry, tense, will continue to argue long after someone had enough
- Assertive → concerned about both their needs and other people’s needs
- Active listening → empathic listening without judgement
- Body language
- Reflecting feelings
- Repeating
- Ask questions
- Say things like “i understand” or stuff like that to show you pay attention
- Silence
- Types of questions
- Problem oriented questions → turned toward the past (what is the problem, what are the facts, etc)
- Solutions oriented questions → turned toward the future (what do you want, what do you need, etc)
- Types of reactions
NVC is not about changing the way you talk; it’s about changing the way you think and the way you view the world
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NVC is not a way to speaking, it’s mostly self introspection → see street NVC
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Non meta-NVC
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forgetting context, systemic oppressions and privileges
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denial of responsibility
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converting obligation to choices, those choices might be flawed, might be rigged and extremely difficult but they always remain choices
- I have to → I choose to
- I should → I might
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exagerations
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avoiding “you” confrontatinos when talking to someone
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taking responsibility for your own feelings
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negative message
- taking things personally
- blame the speaker and feel angry
- shine a light of consciousness on our own feelings and needs
- shine a light of consciousness on the speaker’s feelings and needs
People who are in touch with their needs do not make good slaves
- requests
- using positive action language
- instead of “stop doing X” or “dont do Y”, instead you can say “please keep your volume down”
- request vs demand
- request is when there is no authority of one over the other
- can say no without consequences
- don’t try to always please others otherwise you forget about your own needs and end up hurting others too
- take your time
- you can’t force people, if people don’t want to talk, they won’t
case study goal actions star thingy nvc expected outcomes
key challenges clear actionable plan smart
conflict resolution high visibility task alex thinks priya takes everything priya thinks alex doesn’t take initiatives whole team is impacted
talk with them indivudually then together gather information understanding needs providing empathy understanding the underlying causes and triggers restructure the task management in accordance to the needs of both making guesses about the needs of both to guide them creating a sort of program/schedule of high visibility tasks feedback on the new plan later prince2 risk management ? design thinking getting feedback lead a sort of brainstorming for the task management
values of people values = different for different people = ways to achieve needs needs = universal for everybody
argumentation par rapport aux valeurs, besoins etc, STAR, etc
management styles
democratic/sociocracy/collaborative, employees are part of the decision making process transformational, innovators, change and growth, encourage employees to go beyond their comfort zone coaching, teacher, motivating laissez-faire, monitor but aren’t really involved in the decision making process autocratic, makes all the decisions